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I'm done pretending: I hate my breasts - Printable Version

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I'm done pretending: I hate my breasts - Imbalance - 19-12-2016

I've been a lurker on this forum for over three years. I'm 23 now. Since I was young, I was bullied and teased over my small breasts. They've been called "mosquito bites", "ant hills", and my friends used to call me "A.C.", short for "A cup". Men have told me to my face that they don't like my breasts. And when women talk about liking other women, they always make the joke that "Who doesn't like boobs?", which always leaves me feeling terrible because I have none. My roommate expressed surprise when I first told her I was interested in a job as an erotic dancer. She asked how could I make any money when I have such small breasts.

The other day I was at a party with my partner when he said that a woman had nice tits. They were "round", "big", and "perky", he said. I've tried to push these comments out of my head...He isn't a bad guy--we both openly comment on other people. I just wasn't braced for the comment on another woman's breasts. I've always had NBE in the back of my mind but it had gone away recently. Since he made that comment on Friday, it's come back. I'm obsessed. I know that my breasts are not worth any compliments...

I long for a proportionate body. My measurements are 31" (on a good day), 26, 36. My stomach is always bloated. I have to suck it in constantly or it will stick out passed my breasts and make my figure look even more undesirable. I just can't stand having small breasts anymore. I don't want implants--I want to be a natural, feminine woman with real, beautiful breasts. I feel like a failure...Every day, I look in the mirror and hate what I see. The feeling had gone away temporarily, but it's back. I really wish my partner had never made that comment, but I don't blame him for it.

The one person I was with that made me feel better about myself was this man who always talked about how much he loved small breasts. He said he loved when they were just a handful, or less. We went to a strip club together and he spent the night talking about the small breasts on some of the women. I know my current partner doesn't feel that way, and it makes me feel terrible about myself...

So, I've finally decided to join Breast Nexus to just admit to myself that this is what I want. I'll keep a brave face on around my younger sisters with small breasts (which are still bigger than mine) because I don't want them to hate themselves too, and I don't want to set a bad example. But secretly, I long for bigger breasts, and a proportionate body. Even being a full A or small B would make me happy. Just something to balance out my huge bottom. Men have also talked about how disproportionate my butt is to the rest of my body. I'm 5'1". I don't know why some people are so mean.

So, I'm done pretending. I hate my breasts! I hate them. I've always hated them. I've never loved them. Any time I ever said I loved my body just how it was, I was lying. Any time I ever said I had finally overcome society's standards of beauty, I was lying. Two other men I had slept with both prodded me into getting breast implants. "Didn't you say you were going to get breast implants?" they both tried to reverse psychology me...Ha. Well, everyone who wanted to change me wins.

I see people on here and on other websites who throw caution out the window in the pursuit of bigger and/or more shapely breasts. I read about people who have had ovaries nearly rupture, or who have developed hard lumps in their breasts, etc…I was cautious about all of this before which is why I never fully jumped into NBE, but I’m over it now. My self-hatred has finally won and I don’t care about risking my health if it means I can have the beautiful body I want. I’ll deal with all of the adverse side effects when I get there.

I can’t speak anyone else’s truth for them, but I will finally admit for myself: I want to change my breasts. Why? Because I don’t love them just the way they are.


(Please PM me privately to respond to this post. Thanks.)


RE: I'm done pretending: I hate my breasts - hannah - 20-12-2016

Goodluck, you are still young so jumping on the train now can be a good decision for you, hopefully it will change you're life like you are aiming for and you can look with different eyes to yourself. In the meanwhile dont be to hard on yourself, this journey can take a lot of time and its not something you will do in "just" 6 months. Im curious to your program already as you sound pretty motivated.Smile


RE: I'm done pretending: I hate my breasts - Happyme - 20-12-2016

Hi Imbalance,
Your on the right track finally!
First you need to love the breasts you have, because these are what you will nurture to become the breasts of your desire.
And to begin this new admiration, I would suggest massage. Its easy, free, and the best way I know to feel your growth and form them correctly.
I have two of my favorite threads that will pretty much tell you everything there is know about the fine art of breast massage:

http://www.breastnexus.com/showthread.php?tid=25391

http://www.breastnexus.com/showthread.php?tid=26280

So take some measurements, and pictures so you have a reference. Then begin.
Also a big one here is to talk to the partner, and get him on board. Its ok to tell him your sensitive about the size of your breasts and want to begin NBE. Even invite him to help with the massage. He'll enjoy that and make sure you tell him if he is doing well or needs to change the rhythm. Be positive so you both will be working to the same goal.

I'll let the other girls here guide you on the best herbs to use.
Hugs
Bobbi


RE: I'm done pretending: I hate my breasts - Sybiann - 09-01-2017

WTF.! I'm sorry, but who the hell are these people to be commenting on YOUR body like that?!?! They're not perfect either, nobody is. Totally Not their place to be saying anything about your breasts. 

I can relate to feeling dejected when your bf says another girl's breasts (significantly larger than mine) look good. But mine are still fun to play with, and if my bf isn't going to tease and pinch my nipples how I like, then I'll just do it myself! Gotta show him how Wink

Anyways, good luck on your journey. Hope you find success and love for your boobies!


RE: I'm done pretending: I hate my breasts - psychodelic - 04-03-2017

I used to have an ed And I remember being in high school and people would say things like "oh you would be attractive if you only had boobs" and my friend once called my breasts "tea cups", I still haven't forgotten. 

Point is. You aren't a lone. People can be callous. But it's most likely a reflection of their own insecurities and they see your body as an easy target. 

I also had small boobs. For years I told myself big boob would make me happy. So I commuted myself to NBE. I grew from a B cup and I'm currently a DD cup, and I'll tell you now.. I am still unhappy, insecure and dysphoric. 

I think no matter what, if you have emotional wounds inside you.. you can alter your external appearance forever. But you will never be satisfied. That's how I feel about it anyway.


RE: I'm done pretending: I hate my breasts - sweetorange - 05-03-2017

(04-03-2017, 03:14 PM)psychodelic Wrote: I used to have an ed And I remember being in high school and people would say things like "oh you would be attractive if you only had boobs" and my friend once called my breasts "tea cups", I still haven't forgotten. 

Point is. You aren't a lone. People can be callous. But it's most likely a reflection of their own insecurities and they see your body as an easy target. 

I also had small boobs. For years I told myself big boob would make me happy. So I commuted myself to NBE. I grew from a B cup and I'm currently a DD cup, and I'll tell you now.. I am still unhappy, insecure and dysphoric. 

I think no matter what, if you have emotional wounds inside you.. you can alter your external appearance forever. But you will never be satisfied. That's how I feel about it anyway.


We all do, I guess. 

There is a saying in spanish " Find out your fears so no one can use them against you" - I think that is something we should learn.


I have had insecurities with my body since I was a kid - people used to pick on me cause I am petite and thin . They used to call me "weak" for my physical appearance.