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feeling unsettled
#1
i feel so unsettled about something and i think i’m just venting a little while it's still fresh. i told this girlfriend of mine something she didn’t want to hear. i was honest and i felt i had to say what i did. it was a bit hard for me to do. i tried my best to be diplomatic how i chided and thoughtful how i framed my feelings but in fact, she wasn’t really very kind, in fact, you know that feeling when you’ve been hustled and you don’t realize it till you’re right in the middle of it but you’re too nice to call them out in the moment cuz basically you just can't fkg believe they're doing what they're doing. i mean, you could or you could just let them finish doing their thing and be courteous and decline the eventuality of their disgusting shake-down. they’re being so polite but you know what’s going on and you know you’re the target. anyway, i said what i said and right now she’s in a total black-out. i feel weird. yeah, i know  ..this is kinda cryptic. sorry. i don't want to talk details. i feel i did the right thing and i stood up for myself and i should feel good for finding the strength to say what i said ..but, at the same time, i feel sad and so strangely unsettled i've probably lost the friend i thought was mine. Sad
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#2
Yea for you Solome!
It sounds like you have been approached by the Amway sales person. Smile
I found that when I was younger and didnt want to hurt peoples feelings I'd get suckered along until I could find a cheap and easy way to shake this person.
Now that I have some scars on me, I find it easier to call a spade a spade. and if they dont want to talk to me again, well there are billions of people our here that I havent even met yet that could be my new BFF.
And it might be good for the other person as well. They could see the error of their ways.
Good on ya!
Bobbi
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#3
oh, thanks so much bobbi for those encouraging words. i think it’s one of my life’s bigger objectives to find my strength and speak truth to those who are trying to manipulate me, to stand strong against the shameless, wicked pretty friends who walk and talk without a conscience, without empathy and without a sense of self-sacrifice for any higher purpose whatever it may be. 

i don’t know how many times someone has scolded me for being too nice for my own good. anyway, i think it was a lesson for me but now i’m a new and improved formula concentrated for more whitening power. uhh, sorry, i’ve been washing clothes. it still hurts to be victimized but i need to love and respect myself and guard against those who are alluring and beautiful yet forceful in their sleight of hand. i need to thrust my sword into the ground and stand tall, chest out with super impressive nbe breasts and count myself among other women of power and honor. thx so much for your reply bobbi  Rolleyes
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#4
You sound a lot like me. I have made it a goal of mine to be able to say how I feel in a moment if my boundaries are crossed or feelings are hurt. If I don't say anything then the words just get stuck in my head and I start to obsess so I have to get them out in the form of a clear boundary or expression of feelings in a non emotional way. How the other person receives the info is beyond our control but if you feel you've changed a pattern by speaking your mind based on your values then that makes you a stronger person just for the experience. Feel good about representing yourself in a healthy way and advocating for what you beleive in. Yay you!
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#5
(14-05-2017, 03:51 AM)Thematrix Wrote: You sound a lot like me. I have made it a goal of mine to be able to say how I feel in a moment if my boundaries are crossed or feelings are hurt. If I don't say anything then the words just get stuck in my head and I start to obsess so I have to get them out in the form of a clear boundary or expression of feelings in a non emotional way. How the other person receives the info is beyond our control but if you feel you've changed a pattern by speaking your mind based on your values then that makes you a stronger person just for the experience. Feel good about representing yourself in a healthy way and advocating for what you beleive in. Yay you!


thank you matrix girl. you know, i have these fleeting thoughts, sometimes, that i may be livng in the wrong world but then, i remember something i read in an edgar cayce biography ..he said living in this world is hard  ..really, really hard. you struggle, psychologically, emotionally, physically but if you persevere and try to see clearly your way then you can make a lot of progress. of course, his reference had to do with reincarnation, still, i think i get what it is i need to learn. we can’t go through this world and not look after ourselves and that means looking to our own defense when necessary …and often, it is necessary. i feel better about it. it’s been about 2wks, i haven’t talked to her, i don’t suppose i will but like bobbi said, there are a lot of good friends in this bigass world yet to meet, yet to love, yet to whom to give your sweet loyalty and yet with whom to make this crazy-ass world a wonderful place. Rolleyes
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