[gasolinerainbow]

Where I live they seem to expect us to walk around with F cups and it's kinda nice to know I'm not going crazy - I thought they were starting to look quite big now too. Once again regretting not posting photos from when I began :/

My boyfriend and I pretty much broke up today. He told me the only thing he's looking forward to in our relationship is me moving to Belfast next year so he can get on with this his life. I've never felt so hurt, and all because we had arranged to go to an event together and he just went without me so I got upset about it! Of course I'm gonna get upset about it! He always refuses to go out with me when I ask him too he refused to meet any of my friends for a year, he never takes me to + 1 things. The exception being the ONE time I didn't invite him out with me (last week) he had a hissy fit and said of course he wanted to come! 'Struth!

But yeah, he hasn't officially ended it yet, so I guess I'm gonna. I may have been too patient and forgiving during the relationship but I really don't have time for maybe's and I don't know's.

The horrible thing is I did see myself marrying him and settling down not any time soon but in the future. I thought we'd resolve our differences and get to understand each other better but it seems like I'm the only one prepared to make the effort. I suppose the other day when he said 'if you're waiting for me to propose you, you're gonna be waiting forever' was a pretty clear sign :/ he said it's because he doesn't believe in marriage and it's a stupid bit of paper but I know that if he really loved and respected someone that would override his childish reasons for 'hating' marriage.

And I guess he's never going to really love or respect me

Sorry to vent. It's been a rough day.