[Missed Miss]

Well, one night, I went on a blind date with this girl. We met at a designated location. Just a street corner we both knew of, and, when we met, I discovered the true meaning of, “blind date”. She chose to leave her dog at home and opted for the cane. Before we went on our date, she said she needed to stop in at the drug store a few doors away from where we were, so that’s where we headed first. Once inside, she started knocking ALL SORTS of things off the shelves with her cane!!!! I asked her if she needed help, and she said, “No thanks, I’m just looking.” I grabbed her and rushed her outside before she got us into trouble!! Thankfully, we made a clean escape, but she demanded we go back in because she didn’t get what she went in for, but I insisted we get it later!! She said she needed it now!! I asked what it was and said I’d go in and get it FOR her. She wanted some kind of Unguentine type salve for her fingers. She said she accidentally burnt them while mistakenly trying to read a waffle iron!

I could see this date was going to be difficult, so I started thinking I should try to ditch her. But, how do I do it? Do I just walk away from her quietly? Do I tell her that I love to waltz, take her in my arms and whirl her around a few times, then let go and sneak away? Do I help her onto a bus and then get off before the doors close?

We walked along for a bit and we came upon a fountain. She heard the water running and knew it was a fountain and got real excited and kept saying, “I wanna make a wish!! I wanna make a wish!!” So, I picked her up by the ankles and spun around real fast and she went, “WSSSSSHHHHHHH!! WSSSSSSHHHHHH!!” By then, I KNEW she was a dizzy dame!! I saw to THAT!!

Well, we couldn’t quite decide on what we should do on this date. I wanted to go miniature golfing and see a movie. She wanted to go to an amusement park and drive the bumper cars!! That’s how she gets out her pent up anger! She has a SEVERE case of road rage!!!! She kept RAMMING into any car she could find!!!! She did some MAJOR damage!!!! I tried to settle her down, but she just kept yelling, “I don’t care, LET `em take my license away!!!! It’s never stopped me before!!!!” I said, “I know, but we’re not even in the park, yet!!!!” I drove the rest of the night.

After the date, I took her back to her place and she asked for a good night kiss, but she couldn’t find my lips to kiss me, so she held up her dog in front of her and HE kissed me!!