[lamenting]

So not sure if you are aware but there is such a thing called "sister sizing" which basically means for example you are a 36E you go up a band size and down a cup size to 38DD and its the same cup volume or up a cup size and down a band size to a 34F and its the same cup volume and you can keep going down or up the cup sizes doing the same thing to get your "sister size" however Im really sorry to tell you this but none of those are sister sizes as they are all band 32 meaning it really doesnt make much sense how you are able to fill a 32C if you can still comfortably fit into a 32 A.... If I were you I would go get professionally sized at a good bra shop meaning not VS etc as they do "vanity sizing" making you bigger than you are. Hope this helps and Im so sorry to hear that we have body dysmorphia in common its a beast of a thing for us girls to deal with, hang in there and know you are worthy and beautiful no matter what bra size you wear we are all just flesh its whats on the inside and how you act in real life(ie you tell the truth, you treat good people with kindness etc) that makes you a good person 

thank you. it helps knowing that some brands just lie to make you seem bigger… but now im worried ill never be able to get my breasts to be any bigger if they really truly are on the smaller end, even by actual bra size standards (i cant really go to a professional, but ive done some research and measuring and i think I'm a b cup)

its just so hard. my partner thinks i look just fine and says small boobs are great, but i still want them bigger and am afraid theyll never get any bigger than the measly little b cup. kinda hard not to feel not feminine enough and ugly about it