[mochaccino]

The PC cream made me feel heavily sedated. I didn't even know that it was a possible side effect. It didn't just make me sleepy, I was so tired that I had a scary experience I haven't had in ages. I don't take sleeping pills any more, but when I first took them as a teenager, I reacted really strongly to them, probably because my system wasn't used to them. The best way I can explain is to say that I felt like I was trapped in sleep.

My experience with PC was just like that, and it doesn't happen all the time. This was maybe the third time it has happened to me ever. I woke up only halfway this morning, but then felt as if I was struggling to move. I tried to claw my way upright, holding the wall but I just kept falling back down. All this time, I was still half asleep, so I kept giving up the fight and then slipping back into dreams that were each a few seconds long. Because I was so upset and feeling trapped, they were mostly nightmares. In one, I imagined that I succeeded in clawing my way out of bed and made it all the way to the bathroom to brush my teeth, but when I looked in the mirror my eyes were dark holes. I feel like all this strugging went on for a very long time. In reality it probably took 4 or 5 minutes, which is still waaay to long. Even after fully waking up, I felt as if I had just come out of anesthesia. It's already 3 pm and I still feel really groggy. Not just groggy but zombie like.

I didn't say all that just to complain, even though it really sucked. I wanna know what it means that I'm having such an extremely strong reaction to a 25 mg dose of progesterone. Was my existing progesterone level so low that my body has forgotten what to do with it? Maybe the opposite is true and I'm heavily progesterone dominant. Or maybe it means absolutely nothing, and I'm just going to have deal with the grogginess and night terrors. What on earth is going on?