[blue.cupcakes]

Hiya,
I have never spoked out about this to anypne beofre untill finding this site has made me pluck up the courage..
Ever since i can remember i have worried about the size of my boob's, i know 100% that they are underdeveloped or possibly even tubular, i have never left my house without a ridiculously padded bra in a size wayyyy to big just to make me feel better about myself, but i know it looks stupid and that dont help solve the problem when you take it off! just makes me feel even more low at the fact i have nothing, whatsoever, not even an a, aa, aaa, just flat skin with a nipple on! i would be grateful to have what mpost of the girls on here class as tiny or small lol.
I have been so so down about this, im now turning to drugs because i am starting to become so low, i know thats wrong but i feel as there is no option for me... im mentally scarred in my head this is everything to me, i am a woman obbessed! people think im stupid but this is taking over my life! i cry on a daily basis about this and feel like such a stupid bitch, all my friends are at least a c or bigger and it makes me feel sick! i get so jealous and even more upset that i have actually stopped talking to a few that have massive boob's! i know how silly i sound but this is stopping me getting on with my life!
i row with my boyfriend on a daily basis due to this, i have been with him for a year and half and he has never seen me naked and i will never show him my boobs the way they look now, i am so discusted and ashamed of my body, im a size 8 about 8 and half stone and i wear a 32 aa (but i dont even begin to fill it out), i have seen girls at the age of 14 with bigger boobs than me and i feel sick, i have the figure of a 15 year old boy!
i go crazy at my boy if he ever trys to touch me there, i freeze up and push him away he keeps telling me he dont care how big they are and he loves me for me but that if i dont get over this complex soon he will leave me cos it cant go on forever, he has tried and tried to help me but i just freak out bigggg time if anyone ever touches me there, i have broke up with 2 prevoius partners due to this :'(.
i feel as everything i wear looks ridiculous as i have nothing at all up top, i dont go out no more, my sex life is shocking, i cry at night, i cant go swimming or to the beach, this complex is making my life fall apart, and i dont know what to do no more!
i dont have a lot of money and cant afford to get all these pills and creams and feel like i have no where to turn :'( i tried breat actives as my 'last resort' for 6 months, pffttt WASTE of money what a crappy product! i know there is a lot more to life than boob's but i just hope by finding this site they might be someone out there who understands how i feel with advice, i feel so alone .
i massage every day i can, i also own a noogleberry but have had no success with it as i cannot do it as much as needed due to my work, living condition's and hiding it all from my boyfriend.
i have zero confidence and really do not want to post pictures, i cant go on like this i dont want to sound vain or petty but i just dont know what to do no more i have never been so depressed about anything beofre in my life, this hasd been going since i was about 14/15 i am 19 now, and NOOOO they will not grow any bigger naturally, i have finished 'maturing' my mum only has size 32 aa big boob dont run in my family really, but she is having a boob job next month.... which i am so jealous about!
if i could afford surgery i would jump at the chance to be honest, i wish nbe would work for me, but for people that start with nothing what so ever, it just doesnt look promising...
Wven being a a or b would make me happy!
Someone please help me .....
Im sorry for sounding so down and rambling on but i need to get this all off my chest!

Jaide xx

Hi there,

I am so sorry to hear about you having to go through this. I completely understand. I am 19 also and I have the exact same problem. I don't have any breasts at all. I am a 32 AA but I don't even fill the bra out that's how small they are. My chest looks like the chest of a 10 year old boy and the worst part is that i've been stressed lately so i've been eating like crazy and I gained weight. I am chubby now and I still have no breasts. They have never developed and now that i'm 19 I don't think they ever will. I know how you feel about not wanting to show your BF your breasts. I had a BF 2 years ago and while we were together he never saw me completely naked. I felt so ashamed and embarrassed and disgusted with myself. I didn't even want him to feel them because there was nothing there to feel. I have tried a few things and nothing has worked. I tried using a supplement that has herbs in it that acts like female hormones to increase breast size and It did not work for my breasts at all. It made me hungry and I actually gained weight around my thigh and hip area. I also tried an estrogen cream and rubbed it into my breasts, that also did not make them bigger. I tried pumping with the Noogleberry and Bosom Beauty which worked temporary to make them appear a little bigger but as soon as the swelling goes down they're right back to normal. It's VERY frustrating. I have to basically pump for 4 hours before I can have s*x with my partner or else I don't have anything for him to feel. So far nothing has worked for me, i'm sorry I couldn't help you much. If I ever find something I will let you know. I feel bad for you that you have to go through this, it really sucks!

I hope things start going better for you and everyone else who has this same problem as us. Good luck with everything, take care hun xoxo