[Jenniferlove]

Uhh, what are you talking about..
If you were talking about the beauty, I could understand that, but reducing it only to the bust size is ridiculous! Pretty face, butt, legs, toned body and breasts, how can you reduce appearance only to breasts?! And then also only to the size, its not only about the size, the shape is as important, if they only look good in a bra, that's not really an ideal of pretty breasts. DO you have men colleagues, good friends? They report very often how disappointed they were after a girl took off her bra on a date..They thought they were bigger, perkier etc..

Breasts and the rest of the body are important to attract someone, but they are definitely not a base of any relationship, its more about the person, if its only based on looks it won't last long, it is only true that you give it more try for the sake of the beauty. And reducing the beauty or sexual attractiveness only to boobs is nonsense. Only if you are dating a boob-fetishist, but I really wonder who is interested in something like that. Would you take a guy who didn't want you with small breasts, but wants you after you have increased your bust??

Uh....I think you read it incorrectly. That is not what I meant at all. What I am asking is if a female has a small chest (A cup maximum) will there be a greater chance that she has low self-esteem which in turn will pollute the relationship, thus making there a smaller success rate long-term? I did partially mentioned men too, but the main question is a confidence thing.

Not only that but as the discussion progressed and new points were brought up I mentioned being large AND perky. Not saggy boobs. And yes, I have heard countless disappointments from men when they take the bra off. I have also heard the sheer awe from the perfect breast when the bra is removed. Please read the full discussion.

[Jenniferlove]

I have to disagree about the small breasts affecting your sex life. I've been with my husband for four years and our sex life is pretty slammin' despite my petite boobies. The largest set of breasts he has been with has been like a C cup I think. Is he attracted to large breasts? Who isn't! I'm also attracted to guys with tattoos and he doesn't have any. People are going to be attracted to different things. It doesn't affect us.

I think the key to a good relationship and a healthy sex life is confidence. I would love large breasts, but I don't have them and I may never have them. I was blessed with other good assets, so I try to carry myself just like I would carry myself were I the owner of this "perfect" body that I daydream about having.

I agree with you. My sex life has been great and filled with confidence, small boobs and all. BUT, as they have grown, for ME, they have become a more enjoyable asset. You did not have no boobs though to begin with, did you? I'm talking A cup maximum. Tiny things. I always had tissue/something to grab onto, although small. Had I not, I am sure my confidence in bed would have been bad.

That doesn't mean I didn't have a complex about my size, I was just able to keep it separate from intimacy.

[timarie]

I have oooh so much to say about the things commented on in this thread but as I am short on time, I will make it brief.

Firstly in brief comment of the last two exchange of posts: Ladies, confidence is not confidence if you are imagining or pretending or acting it out. Confidence is actually thinking and knowing you are attractive. Period. So, one cannot really say they are insecure while saying they are confident... it's like, a paradox.

And secondly, I want to make it clear to anyone who reads this thread: IF YOU DO NOT LOVE YOURSELF THE WAY YOU ARE NOW, NEITHER NBE NOR BIGGER BREASTS WILL GIVE IT TO YOU. If anyone gets a sense of greater self-love from bigger breasts, it is an unhealthy form of love that will not last long. The same goes for men with their want for something more. If he is not happy with you the way you are now (despite not having the PERFECT body in his mind), then he will never be happy with you. They are superficial sources of a happiness which always need more off of which to feed. It can never be satisfied.

I feel like I have said this so many times on this forum and am sick of the opposite being taught by other members on this forum.

Instead of relishing the possible correlation between self-esteem/confidence, boob size, and relationship success/quality, why don't we talk about how people can REALLY improve their self-esteems and self-loves, WITHOUT increasing their boob size? That, my friends, is when you know you have a healthy, happy person. This site is the place where women need to learn to be strong to love themselves simply for who they are, boy or no boy, big boobs or small boobs. This is because no matter what we do to improve our physical appearance, if we don't love ourselves now, we will never love ourselves. Women should avoid striving to obtain a self-love that is dependent on a man's opinion of her.

As I wrote on someone else's thread: "NBE should not be a "do or die" thing, but more of an "I already like myself the way I am, but I like to embellish and improve sometimes if I can!" type of thing. The path to success is the path to happiness and the people who are on this NBE train with a "do or die" mentality are only setting themselves up to never be truly happy. If you do not love yourself with small breasts, you will not love yourself with large breasts either (you will just always want more and more), so happiness starts with loving yourself the way you are! This way, you will be happy no matter what happens (or doesn't happen) with your breasts."

I hope this mentality of bigger boobs = better life will stop. Because only superficial people are made happier by bigger boobs. This may be good and fine for some, but as I said, some people are deeper than that and actually want real happiness. If anyone reading this thread is looking for real happiness, you will NOT find it by growing your boobs. I hope I have driven home a point, here.

That was MUCH longer than I intended it to be.......

[lostacres6]

A little off the subject but in the same general frame of mind......
Sports Issustrated magazine just came out with their swimsuit version. I know sex sells & they want to make money but it's all the talk on news shows, newspapers, etc on how HOT the magazine's models are. They even made a video of Kate Upton in a skimpy suit in zero gravity which has gone viral. I can just see all the men salivating looking at the photos of half naked, big busted women.
Many big busted women celebrities have implants (just google celebrity implants & you'll be amazed). But to men it doesn't matter implanted or not just as long as they're big. So no wonder so many of us have an inferiority complex. Yes, beauty is from within, etc. but tell that to the salivating men!!!! I'm in NBE for MYSELF but I'd like my husband ( & only him) to admire & salivate over my big breasts, if I ever get them!!!!!

[TibetanPrincess]

@SyrianPrincess, I feel sorry for you if this is how you think. This is what sparked my need to dive in again but on a more serious note.

@JLove,

I think what Timarie is trying to say, and not in an attacking way (please correct me if I have just put my foot in my damn mouth @Timarie), is that you were obviously insecure about your breasts, but you acted or portrayed that you weren't and people close to you (like your BF) can read that, even if you are disillusioned to think you are not that bothered by it (small chest insecurity). Hence the posts you wrote, (a few back and which I already mildly addressed and you confirmed it.)

I also have noticed this with you and it gets confusing (the little contradictions). Please don't take it like this is intended to attack your character, its just something that pops up alot in your posts.

And her 2nd statement: It seems as though you wear most of your confidence on your chest (giving you potentially false self esteem), rather than wanting to improve your actual self esteem by unsuperficial means. It just seemed the more your boobs grew, the more you loved and appreciated, approved of yourself. Not to say you had 0 love for yourself or 0 self esteem. And confidence is def fine to have more of, it was just the contradicting statements that make one confused and question. Its like you didn't realize how bad it was, the misery over your chest back then, until they grew. And you still say how important it is to have self esteem and love yourself, but you promote it by superficial means instead of it germinating internally without means of superficial methods. Your BF's validation of your superficial accomplishment became your meter to how much your self esteem has risen, meaning by his perspective of you as a woman on the outside instead your esteem rising from your perspective of yourself from within.

Also, as with your BF, you mentioned his respect for you has grown more suddenly and perhaps suspect a willingness to try harder on his end in your relationship, to fight for you if need be, as if your worth went up more than before.

Since I'm on that, I really don't see how a guy could respect a girl more because she has the big boobs to go with her big brain? I feel like you misconstrue the sexual, superficial admiration they have for you as "respect," because 9 out of 10, that's all that it really is, they are just admiring your outside and are willing to give you more time on what you have to say. Are their eyes off your breasts the whole time? Because that's hard for most men. As for your BF, he loves you already so I assume he had respect for you before, I just don't understand why it would be anymore than what he should have for you already.

So that (though off subject of what Timarie's post is talking about) kind of bothered me personally: the generalization of men, because this also sends a message that small breasted women with brains may not be able to get that same respect as a woman with large breasts and a brain; as if they are more superior than them.

If this is not what you meant, can you please clarify? I'd love to know what you mean by: more respected by males because one has both large breasts and a brain to go with it.

So in that case, maybe what I just wrote above IS in correlation with what Timarie was trying to get across, which is, with what you are posting here, the messages you are sending, is going against what most of us are trying to get away from, which is loving ourself for superficial reasons, fixing our superficial imperfections to have self esteem, the approval of a male's perspective of what identifies us as sexy women to be desired, worthy of trying harder for in a relationship... rather than sending the message that knowing we are all the same and worth trying for, in a relationship no matter what our breast size is, even if we are insecure. We grow breasts because its "icing on the cake," we do it for ourselves rather than approval from others,fitting in clothing, for many different little reasons. Sure, we have insecure thoughts about our breasts in general, many of us, but not all of us here. Growing breasts should never be for measurement of our self esteem. Men are insecure too. No one is perfect in the looks dept. I'm tired of seeing girls crying over some jackass, beer gutted, balding, emotional abusive guy who demeans them because they don't have something they desire in a woman. They get suicidal over it. Many of us have been traumatized by our lack there-of (curves) from the past and some of us still carry some of that torment with us.
And this is coming from a woman who is no longer small chested.

Thoughts anyone?
@Timarie, do I need to take my foot out of my mouth? Or have I touched onto what you were saying here?

[Jenniferlove]

@SyrianPrincess, I feel sorry for you if this is how you think. This is what sparked my need to dive in again but on a more serious note.

@JLove,

I think what Timarie is trying to say, and not in an attacking way (please correct me if I have just put my foot in my damn mouth @Timarie), is that you were obviously insecure about your breasts, but you acted or portrayed that you weren't and people close to you (like your BF) can read that, even if you are disillusioned to think you are not that bothered by it (small chest insecurity). Hence the posts you wrote, (a few back and which I already mildly addressed and you confirmed it.)

I also have noticed this with you and it gets confusing (the little contradictions). Please don't take it like this is intended to attack your character, its just something that pops up alot in your posts.

And her 2nd statement: It seems as though you wear most of your confidence on your chest (giving you potentially false self esteem), rather than wanting to improve your actual self esteem by unsuperficial means. It just seemed the more your boobs grew, the more you loved and appreciated, approved of yourself. Not to say you had 0 love for yourself or 0 self esteem. And confidence is def fine to have more of, it was just the contradicting statements that make one confused and question. Its like you didn't realize how bad it was, the misery over your chest back then, until they grew. And you still say how important it is to have self esteem and love yourself, but you promote it by superficial means instead of it germinating internally without means of superficial methods. Your BF's validation of your superficial accomplishment became your meter to how much your self esteem has risen, meaning by his perspective of you as a woman on the outside instead your esteem rising from your perspective of yourself from within.

Also, as with your BF, you mentioned his respect for you has grown more suddenly and perhaps suspect a willingness to try harder on his end in your relationship, to fight for you if need be, as if your worth went up more than before.

Since I'm on that, I really don't see how a guy could respect a girl more because she has the big boobs to go with her big brain? I feel like you misconstrue the sexual, superficial admiration they have for you as "respect," because 9 out of 10, that's all that it really is, they are just admiring your outside and are willing to give you more time on what you have to say. Are their eyes off your breasts the whole time? Because that's hard for most men. As for your BF, he loves you already so I assume he had respect for you before, I just don't understand why it would be anymore than what he should have for you already.

So that (though off subject of what Timarie's post is talking about) kind of bothered me personally: the generalization of men, because this also sends a message that small breasted women with brains may not be able to get that same respect as a woman with large breasts and a brain; as if they are more superior than them.

If this is not what you meant, can you please clarify? I'd love to know what you mean by: more respected by males because one has both large breasts and a brain to go with it.

So in that case, maybe what I just wrote above IS in correlation with what Timarie was trying to get across, which is, with what you are posting here, the messages you are sending, is going against what most of us are trying to get away from, which is loving ourself for superficial reasons, fixing our superficial imperfections to have self esteem, the approval of a male's perspective of what identifies us as sexy women to be desired, worthy of trying harder for in a relationship... rather than sending the message that knowing we are all the same and worth trying for, in a relationship no matter what our breast size is, even if we are insecure. We grow breasts because its "icing on the cake," we do it for ourselves rather than approval from others,fitting in clothing, for many different little reasons. Sure, we have insecure thoughts about our breasts in general, many of us, but not all of us here. Growing breasts should never be for measurement of our self esteem. Men are insecure too. No one is perfect in the looks dept. I'm tired of seeing girls crying over some jackass, beer gutted, balding, emotional abusive guy who demeans them because they don't have something they desire in a woman. They get suicidal over it. Many of us have been traumatized by our lack there-of (curves) from the past and some of us still carry some of that torment with us.
And this is coming from a woman who is no longer small chested.

Thoughts anyone?
@Timarie, do I need to take my foot out of my mouth? Or have I touched onto what you were saying here?

Sorry, I am only able to speed-read these as I don't have much time. I am noticing that some of you are thinking that this post is about me and my personal life only, when really that is not the case. I'm not saying it's not at all, but really, it's more of an observation I've had with extremely small-chested females. I was never extremely small-chested. I have always had a grab. When on the pill (which I was on from let's say 17-27) I was a large B cup/small C. You can get that size looking huge with the right bra.

Like I wrote before, I was in a 10 year relationship where my boob size was never an issue. I find larger boobs erotic and I wanted more of it. Once I found out I could naturally get them it was ON. Just like laser hair removal. Did that and I am thrilled I don't have to shave my legs anymore! Yes, at times I would definitely feel down about them (after my period esp. but that STILL happens).

This is a forum about BOOBS, therefore I narrowed the discussion down to boobs. It's a little sad that you guys are thinking this is all about me when I have said repeatedly it's not. Really, I question everything in life & constantly. I think about everything under the sun, it's just what I do. Worldly issues, psychology, philosophy, etc. I thought I would bring up one of my thoughts, and now it's getting psycho-analyzed as though it's only about me. That's truly not fair.

I think we all get down on ourselves at times, but I have never suffered from extremely low self-esteem. I have always had a lot of attention from guys (and girls, bc as we know females pay attention too), that has never been a problem. I only had one instance in my life where boob size personally affected me and that was when I was cheated on with a huge-chested female. That def confirmed things for me though, I will admit. I have never been told my boobs were small by a guy. It's kind of annoying that I'm having to go so in depth about myself when that was never supposed to be the case. I guess controversial topics cannot be brought up unless we are willing to let the discussion be turned to being about ourselves? What a shame.

All in all, yes, I do think that girls with small chests (very little or no tissue) have a higher chance of self-esteem issues which can in turn affect the quality of their relationships. This is not the case for all relationships OBVIOUSLY, and I hope that maturity & intelligence would outweigh things, but in a world that is bombarded by sex, (natural-looking) plastic surgery which is only on the rise, infidelity and superficiality in general, more and more women are going to feel inferior. That is my opinion.

I also think it's where I live though. I am a city girl and surrounded by perfect 10's. This kind of habitat, if you will, gives me perhaps a skewed reality.

[BonitaDDs]

Uhh, what are you talking about..
If you were talking about the beauty, I could understand that, but reducing it only to the bust size is ridiculous! Pretty face, butt, legs, toned body and breasts, how can you reduce appearance only to breasts?! And then also only to the size, its not only about the size, the shape is as important, if they only look good in a bra, that's not really an ideal of pretty breasts. DO you have men colleagues, good friends? They report very often how disappointed they were after a girl took off her bra on a date..They thought they were bigger, perkier etc..

Breasts and the rest of the body are important to attract someone, but they are definitely not a base of any relationship, its more about the lerson, if its only based on looks it won't last long, it is only true that you give it more try for the sake of the beauty. And reducing the beauty or sexual attractiveness only to boobs is nonsense. Only if you are dating a boob-fetishist, but I really wonder who is interested in something like that. Would you take a guy who didn't want you with small breasts, but wants you after you have increased your bust??

No I don't think breasts make me beautiful like my face is maybe happy with them but still the same I didn't mean that I just mean the women here with big breast normally only if she's fatter or old or fake so I never feel insecure about myself.
My main point was its not nice when men look at me while with their woman I see the woman angry or sad a lot when they do this whether they admit it or not its tension towards him wether she lets it out as an argument or just not doing as he wants maybe this is why small chested women can feel insecure in relationship not everyone but I have heard lots say it even the most beautiful girls.
And yes I have heard men complain they thought a girl had bigger breasts or was thinner in clothes but no not that perky iv not heard was better than big most big natural breasted models don't have nipples to point at the sky but they are nice to look the girl I was talking about you can tell they sag in clothes probably because its so hard here to buy bigger bra than a d so women go up and up the band size.
No Tibetan I don't need bigger or prettier than anyone I am already good enough I don't like attention all the time I try not to notice normally my boyfriend sees them but he's not jealous why when he has what they want
want them bigger because I love really big breasts only.

[rateset]

So this will probably get me backlash and I know this is not nearly true for all relationships, but I wonder.......do relationships have a greater success rate when the female is larger chested? I feel as stupid reading what I just wrote as much as I did while typing it, but truly, I do question this.

All of my friends who have been together 10+ years, married or long-term relationships have large busts. Does this help seal in confidence, nurturing & greater attraction/respect from the male-standpoint? Do smaller-chested females have a complex that at least somewhat puts a gray cloud over their head, stunting their happiness and feeding into insecurities which may leak over into their relationship?

I have always wondered this, but now I am noticing something within my own relationship as my chest grows. The larger I have gotten, the more my bf constantly wants to nuzzle in them, sleep in them, just be all around more cuddly and loving. Has he gained more attraction and "respect" for me? We have always had our ups and downs, but it seems the downs have almost diminished and since I've been "larger" the ups have gone up even higher.

I would like to put out there that he said from the very beginning (before he had even seen my chest) that he was an ass and thigh guy, so I don't think me growing is because he is an all-out boob guy.

Thoughts?

Not only that but as the discussion progressed and new points were brought up I mentioned being large AND perky. Not saggy boobs. And yes, I have heard countless disappointments from men when they take the bra off. I have also heard the sheer awe from the perfect breast when the bra is removed. Please read the full discussion.

The full "discussion" is very shallow and actually embarrassing for this forum..downs in a relationship have diminished because of the breasts, the bigger the breasts the better is the relationship..people in long term relationships are big busted.. you get more "respect" with bigger breasts.. I think I am out of this topic, its too stupid,what you realized yourself as you started it..just reading tibetan sounded sane and mature to me. it is great to get more self esteem with bigger chest, that is desired, but it seems to mess with some girls minds in a strange way too..

[Insanity89]

I don't think this discussion is stupid, you all should understand what a complex is, you can convince yourself that having small breasts isn't a big problem for you, but that sense of inferiority insinuates in your mind and inevitably in your relationship. I know that having big breasts won't heal my self exteem issues but that doesn't mean I'm stupid or immature...

[Insanity89]

I forgot to say that I'm SURE that if I my breasts will grow, my relationship will only benefit from it, not because my boyfriend will love me more, but because I'll be a little more confident about my body