[Katniss]

From 4/10/16 to 4/16/16 I'd been in an alarming state.
I could not control my emotions.
I had no focus or drive. I couldn't seem to get anything done.
I even thought about suicide.
Out of nowhere, I would start to cry uncontrollably.
I almost lost it in front of my boss on the ride home.
I had to come out to a very close friend. She knows everything about me now and my plans to transition.
I texted her on the ride home with my boss and she told me to come right over. As I got to her house I couldn't hold it back anymore. She opened the door and I finally lost it. I was in full crying mode. I couldn't stop for about 15 minutes. She asked me what started it. I told her What I was doing at the time. Nothing stressful or emotional. Just my usual work. Well she dug very deep and like I said I finally came out of the closet. I talked to my mother later that night and I told her that it's been a emotional roller coaster ride. Ups and bad downs. Now she doesn't know what I'm doing. But has noticed my breasts. She just thinks my hormones are off and the upcoming doctors visit will help. But mom said that the way I'm feeling is like a woman who is on her monthly minus certain body parts. This got me thinking, how can this be. I'm a biological male.

This is what I'm taking.
BO, three pills in the morning and three more at night.
PM, three pills in the morning and three more at night. I make my own pills size 000.
Saw palmetto, three in the morning.
Fenugreek, three in the morning.
PC cream in the morning.

I would appreciate any help or thoughts you can give me.

[Tanya Marie Squirrel]

From 4/10/16 to 4/16/16 I'd been in an alarming state.
I could not control my emotions.
I had no focus or drive. I couldn't seem to get anything done.
I even thought about suicide.
Out of nowhere, I would start to cry uncontrollably.
I almost lost it in front of my boss on the ride home.
I had to come out to a very close friend. She knows everything about me now and my plans to transition.
I texted her on the ride home with my boss and she told me to come right over. As I got to her house I couldn't hold it back anymore. She opened the door and I finally lost it. I was in full crying mode. I couldn't stop for about 15 minutes. She asked me what started it. I told her What I was doing at the time. Nothing stressful or emotional. Just my usual work. Well she dug very deep and like I said I finally came out of the closet. I talked to my mother later that night and I told her that it's been a emotional roller coaster ride. Ups and bad downs. Now she doesn't know what I'm doing. But has noticed my breasts. She just thinks my hormones are off and the upcoming doctors visit will help. But mom said that the way I'm feeling is like a woman who is on her monthly minus certain body parts. This got me thinking, how can this be. I'm a biological male.

This is what I'm taking.
BO, three pills in the morning and three more at night.
PM, three pills in the morning and three more at night. I make my own pills size 000.
Saw palmetto, three in the morning.
Fenugreek, three in the morning.
PC cream in the morning.

I would appreciate any help or thoughts you can give me.

sounds like your on an Estrogen rollercoaster with all that Pm and B.O. you are taking, it is not recommended to take them both at once. Usually a person chooses just one or the other. I would also avoid taking Fenugreek as well, since that is also an estrogenic type compound.

[Orangepeels]

with fengreek and pm in your system at the same time, you'd already be loosing your mind. that is phytoestrogen overload!! and then you have bo on top of it which uses your own hormones. not only is your mental health at risk, so is your physical health!

if you can, do a week long detox to get all that excess out of your system asap before it gets any worse. don't worry about loosing your progress either. fenugreek and pm start with swelling so that's all youd be loosing if it does dissapear. BO gives you real growth from the start. Also...I've noticed phytoestrogens and BO don't work very well in the Breast development department when used together.

you need to decide if you want to go herbal or glandular. this is merely the start of whats to come if you keep using both, and if you're going herbal, you need to only use one phytoestrogen (pm OR fenugreek).figure out what y

ou want to do and construct a program from there. there is plenty of info on this site, and any one of us can help if you need it. this program was not very smart. please research more carefully for your sake.

[Katniss]

Thank you Tanya and Orangepeels for all your help.
I started detoxing on Monday. I'm going to detox for two weeks.

I am feeling better now that I haven't been taking anything for two days. I never want to feel like that again.

When I start again this will be my new regiment.
BO three in the morning and night.
Saw Palmetto three in the morning and night.
PC once in the morning.

[AlexisRene]

Sorry you had to go through all of that. But willing to wager the weight of holding within your need to transition & who you are played as much of a role during that time frame. Maybe the meds created a perfect storm?

That aside, remember reading on this forum (maybe posts by Lotus & Abi?) about taking SP with BO. If BO is converting T to E, why suppress it? I need to research more personally as well, but also wanted to share that before you began again.

Good luck with your journey.

[BillyBoy_Delano]

Suicidal ideations are a red flag. If you brought these up to a support group or Psycologist you may be recomended for a suicide hold or stay in the hospital. Depression, Anxiety, or worse may need immediate treatment.

[Tanya Marie Squirrel]

recent studies (perhaps not so recent) indicate depression and suicidal tendencies are possibly linked with vitamin D deficiency, you can safely take up to 5000 I.u. (international units , that's how its sold) per day. it will take up to a month for you to see change. I, myself, take a 5000 i.u. gelcap per day. it has done wonders for my depression.

whether it is a placebo effect or factual, it is still out for speculation.
http://www.webmd.com/depression/news/201...depression

[Orangepeels]

Thank you Tanya and Orangepeels for all your help.
I started detoxing on Monday. I'm going to detox for two weeks.

I am feeling better now that I haven't been taking anything for two days. I never want to feel like that again.

When I start again this will be my new regiment.
BO three in the morning and night.
Saw Palmetto three in the morning and night.
PC once in the morning.

please no saw palmetto! You don't need any help from herbs if youre taking BO. it's not like a phytoestrogen supplement. it's a completely different beast. Here, lemme link you the most helpful thread for BO i know.

http://www.breastnexus.com/showthread.php?tid=24557

And here is a list of things you can take with BO safely that WILL help you

http://www.breastnexus.com/showthread.php?tid=26121

[AbiDrew85]

Thank you Tanya and Orangepeels for all your help.
I started detoxing on Monday. I'm going to detox for two weeks.

I am feeling better now that I haven't been taking anything for two days. I never want to feel like that again.

When I start again this will be my new regiment.
BO three in the morning and night.
Saw Palmetto three in the morning and night.
PC once in the morning.

please no saw palmetto! You don't need any help from herbs if youre taking BO. it's not like a phytoestrogen supplement. it's a completely different beast. Here, lemme link you the most helpful thread for BO i know.

http://www.breastnexus.com/showthread.php?tid=24557

And here is a list of things you can take with BO safely that WILL help you

http://www.breastnexus.com/showthread.php?tid=26121

While I do agree that it's unlikely saw palmetto is helping any, I don't agree with the no herbs at all with BO. When I tried BO I found it to be a little too androgenic for me at that time, so anti-androgen herbs for those who start "male" are a MUST if they are planning to use BO as an OTC prelude to HRT until such time as they can get HRT.

There are also other things that can help you develop even more whilst on BO that are herbs, shatavari, for example. While some people have theorized that shatavari works by being estrogenic, it is in fact completely ineffective in that manner and while its precise mechanism for effect is still unknown what is known about it is that it SPECIFICALLY helps develop milk ducts. Fenugreek otoh, which is another herb traditionally used as a galactagogue is known to work through estrogenic pathways and therefore should not be used in conjunction with BO.

EDIT: BTW, an anti-androgen I would suggest using together with BO if you feel you need one is chinese skullcap (VERY safe, moderately effective), another is possibly green tea extracted for majority EGCg content (not for those with ovaries, otherwise, mostly safe, highly effective, works by boosting aromatization to human estrogens, so could also possibly use lower dose of BO). Something I have not had a chance to try myself but theoretically should work according to my research while staying well within safety margins is the tonka bean. While others suggest reishi mushroom as a source for the active compound I do not because of the other medicinally active compounds in reishi mushroom. Coumarin is the ONLY medicinally active compound in tonka beans. Actually, the people who suggest reishi just haven't done the research to know what the anti-androgen compound in reishi is and yell at me for suggesting OTHER sources of coumarin, thinking they aren't suggesting coumarin themselves. Coumarin is potentially toxic in high enough doses, so be careful with it if you try it. Reishi will likely become toxic from the mycotoxins in reishi long before the coumarin becomes toxic, but coumarin is the only compound in tonka beans that's active, and it is HIGHLY concentrated, so extreme caution must be exercised. I would suggest use of a coffee grinder to grind the beans, and a mg sensitive scale to measure the dose.

[Nikki9]

From 4/10/16 to 4/16/16 I'd been in an alarming state.
I could not control my emotions.
I had no focus or drive. I couldn't seem to get anything done.
I even thought about suicide.
Out of nowhere, I would start to cry uncontrollably.
I almost lost it in front of my boss on the ride home.
I had to come out to a very close friend. She knows everything about me now and my plans to transition.
I texted her on the ride home with my boss and she told me to come right over. As I got to her house I couldn't hold it back anymore. She opened the door and I finally lost it. I was in full crying mode. I couldn't stop for about 15 minutes. She asked me what started it. I told her What I was doing at the time. Nothing stressful or emotional. Just my usual work. Well she dug very deep and like I said I finally came out of the closet. I talked to my mother later that night and I told her that it's been a emotional roller coaster ride. Ups and bad downs. Now she doesn't know what I'm doing. But has noticed my breasts. She just thinks my hormones are off and the upcoming doctors visit will help. But mom said that the way I'm feeling is like a woman who is on her monthly minus certain body parts. This got me thinking, how can this be. I'm a biological male.

This is what I'm taking.
BO, three pills in the morning and three more at night.
PM, three pills in the morning and three more at night. I make my own pills size 000.
Saw palmetto, three in the morning.
Fenugreek, three in the morning.
PC cream in the morning.

I would appreciate any help or thoughts you can give me.

drop everything else ur taking but up the BO, 4 pills in the morning and 4 more at night

its on cheap now for 6.49 and a free bottle so get it while you can stock up. www.swansonvitamins.com

try chaste tree its really mellowed me out and suppose to act as a anti androgen.
Or try white peony people say it also acts as a anti androgen.