(14-05-2016, 20:55)spanky Wrote: (14-05-2016, 20:37)Tanya Marie Squirrel Wrote: (14-05-2016, 14:59)spanky Wrote: I must admit that for most of my life, I never thought seriously about being a woman, growing breasts, or any of it. So I definitely had no sense that I was a female trapped in a man's body or anything like that.
Well into middle age, I started to think about growing breasts and developing a serious interest in being more feminine, but only occasional thoughts about transitioning, or even publicly crossing. I like being part male and part female, and generally don't feel a strong drive to hop the fence altogether. When I am at home, I am much more satisfied being female, but in public I still am quite uncomfortable and feel totally unconvincing in that mode.
At this point, I am growing tired of dwelling on the whole subject and would just like to go with my whims, sometimes sticking with a consistent NBE effort, and other times setting it aside. Do you think this is healthy and safe? Do you have any advice to a fence-sitter like me?
hello caller #1!
in order to answer your question fully, let me ask you the following regarding your NBE routine..
1. do you purge (get rid of all nbe products, only to rebuy them again, and do the same thing again later on ? ) at least one time?
2. do you feel guilty at all while on Nbe,
3 Do you long for NBE when you are not on it?
4. are you aware of a dual-spirited person?
5 . do you prefer to be more androgenous? (neither male nor female.
6. do you feel there is sexual attachment to growing breast, or is it more emotional.
7. do you suffer from headaches or other maladays when not on NBE routine.
8. *if* your body suddenly decides to overcome your natural production of testosterone, and permanently feminize you, not leaving you any choice in the matter.. how would you truly feel? excited? scared? depressed?
9. while on your NBE, do you feel more content, at peace , other sense of satisication.
10. are you hesitant , due to the possibility of losing all make function?
in answering these questions honestly, it may help me determine a proper answer. Please note that I am not a certified physician or psychologist. This is to be considered friendly advice from a co-inhabitor of this site, and my opinions are not necessarily considered that of Breast Nexus, Its owners, or moderators.
1. No. I anticipate resuming nbe each time I "hit pause."
2. No, no guilt. Occasionally I am quite aware that my breasts are quite noticeable. Generally, I wish they would be noticed, although in certain settings, not so much.
3. Yes, I miss it quite a bit.
4. I am at least a dual-spirited person. If there were more than 2 sexes, I might go there.
5. I like being androgenous, but I like being feminine more. An sometimes, I like being masculine. (I have always enjoyed being strong, brave, etc., but I don't see those traits as either uniquely masculine or feminine.)
6. It is both sexual and emotional. There is a definite sensuality about nbe charged breasts, and an identification with sexual fulfillment.
7. No headaches or pains, just a general malaise, and a sense of being lost.
8. I would feel excited and a little nervous. I do not believe I would feel depressed, but a little anxious about "putting it on the table" with some family and friends.
9. Yes, mixed with a mild sense of trepidation.
10. I quite love having a sex life and orgasms, but am not sure that erections are a necessary part of it. In that sense. male "function" is no longer a high priority to me. To date, nbe has perhaps compromised erections some, but I still enjoy sex. It's different, to be sure. Less of the old "in-and-out" to be sure.
So, that's a good set of questions. Perhaps I came to the right therapist!
get out that "sex" wax/surfboard/ski wax and wax those runners.. your going for a ride!
given your answers, I am inclined to think that your mental status is completely normal and not fetish-driven only, which would indicate a severe regret and/or depression should you be suddenly swept off your feet with transition, if in fact you come to that crossroads.
it is normal to have trepidation and hesitation, it is a natural fear, a fear of the unknown. it happens in life all the time ( a new place to live, a new job, etc). it just so happens that in this case, it can be/is a life altering decision. your choices of what you are doing will in fact, change how people perceive you. whether it to be questioning your gender by looking at you, or perhaps embrace you with the loyalty as your friend.
in your reply of them being noticed, but in certain situations seems to indicate that even though you wish for these body changes, you want to be in full control of how,when, where,and why.. which is able to be done, for the most part, that is unless you suddenly sprout to 48DD overnight.. a gradual change is hardly noticeable.
the question of headaches and such is to rule out any physical-nature illness (brain tumor, etc).
As far as sitting on the fence.. it is quite fine.. you are unsure, in time, you will subconsciously decide what it is out of this experience you really wish for. there is also nothing wrong with taking a pause from time to time, for both medicinal and mental reasons: 1. for medical-allow your body to clear built up chemicals, and 2: do a mental check to see if this is really what you want.
I would also look further into your dual-spirted nature.. whom do you think is more dominant? are they truly separate, or merely a different facette of the same gem?
I hope this has been somewhat helpful, if not, please feel free to inquire further
