12-12-2010, 13:15
Dear girls. How should I start this letter. [color]It's been a long journey for me[/color], as for many of you. However, I ended up on a completely different way than I thought it would. I have been married for 2years and are 22 years of age now. Early yes
.
back then I knew that if I married, i would have to work with myself in relation to self-esteem. I married as I said, and it's the best I could do. After some mounts beeing married I've started to think that it might be nice to have bigger breasts. My "truth" was that if I had it, I would be more happy, feel more attractive, be more cofident when im naked but...... Here comes my story and what workd for me!!!!
[color]This summer of 2010 blew my mind away. [/color]I started to only wear push up bras. thats ok, but i did it because i wanted to feel.., you know what im talking about...
I was so unsecure of myself when I saw other girls with big boobs and I was especially unsecure if i watched movies with my husbend, and ladies with big boobs were on the tv. My heart starede to pump more and more.
My man has really been patient with thise feelings i have about my look. The thought occupied me every day and I feelt that i had to find out how I could get bigger breasts. MY thoughts was like this:
If i just find a pill that could help me, i would be so happy and such a loverabel wife "knowing" that i im beautiful, attractive to my husband and not borring to wacht. (My husband has never complained about my breasts size even they are not big. He was crazy about me because my personality has that something, he is looking for and that he is totally crazy about. ( have you ever meet a lovely, good, respected man that married his lady because of her boobs? no way, not if hes a real man! Back to the case
MY man has tried always to tell me i was beautiful and he really treated me well. But what can that help, if i believe that im not good enough, only if i get thise bigger boobs. Do you know the feeling? Despite the thought My mand had about me, I felt that i could make him even happier, more sateficed with me, if my boobs were bigger, i would be more interesting and (Try to notice how much fokus I have on My self, its all me me me) That I could satisfy him even more if the boobs just filled a little more. I began to cry for myself in the evenings and asked my dear father in heaven: Dear God, will you please let them grow just a little, you see how sad i am, I'd really like if you listen to me, if just they were a bit bigger i would be so more happy, and dont you want me to be happy?. There was no answer back right there!?, but I continued to spend time with God, to pray God, that he would help me and my prayers always sounded like "i would be so glad if.. bla bla" Nothing really happend, but i trusted God and hoped that he would help, deep in my heart i knew he wanted the best for me. One day i looked at different websites and i dont now how, but i saw this site. From that day i was totally consumed. I started to be online in approxmely 5 houers every day for 14 days.
My husbend asked me [color]"what are you doing on the website for so long? I told him my secret and he was SO confused. I thought it would be a little embarrassing to say that I would like my breasts to be bigger. I thought it was embarrassing because:[/color]1) My dear man wouldnt understand why this suddenly had such an influence on my, and why? I knew he would ask me face to face: What it your motive? Do you really think your gonna have a happier/better man? a more satesfied man? No way he said. Thats your lie, that become your truth. Why would you change your breast, when you want other girls to believe in them selvs for what they really are? I was embarrised, because what he said was true.
2) It tells something about my personallity, that Im willing to change myself, not to accept my self. Deep down my heart burns for people, and one of my dreams is to help girls, to love them self. But how could i tell another girl: Your just wounderfull as you are, if i dont start with my self first? AND THATS hard, BUT TRULY true.
3) My hearts deepst desire is to be loved, and accepted for WHAT I already am. To feel like Im special. To feel like a have something great to offer this world, to offer my love. Scould i let the breast size deside what i thinking about my self? It would be imbarresing to admit that im so caut up in this worlds idee of what is sexy and attractive. To change my breast size I would be in a conflict towards my deepst desire, as i have mentioned.
4) I also thought it would be embarrassing because,indirectly i would say to my man: I know you love me, but thats not enough for me. I want more. I want more, I, I, I. . ."And the sex we have is good but I want you to desire me more ( my body) and I found a way of doing that.(i think) The boobs will make me more secure as a women, because i know you would think that im sexy. because that is what become my truth, that is what the world and me media want me to belive, and i see it every day and i accepted it and want it. So NOW, stop and think:
is it all about giving a guy an orgasm and not that he wants you because of YOU, and not just your boobs. Deep inside us all, we hunger for real love, ( if we'r not to blind to know what real love is?) real Love and good sex is healing and funny, intimetive. Sometime when me and my man have sex, he reminds me: Kat, this is about you and me, us.. and not how you look, our how your boobs looks. He can honsterly feel when im thinking: oh how do i look in this possion, and do i satefices him enough. Thats not a good sign.
i wish what i have experienced thise last 5mounths would be something you experience in your one life too.
But this is something you must spend time to understand and let your heart grow into. When the thoughts of big breast feel so much as i do right now to you, then i know its difficult to believe that accepting you one breast is the biggest gift you can give yourself.
Its so hard to say NO at something that seems to behold the best for you - If you look at All the pictuers of girls showing there big breasts? Do you really think that they are happy? Do you really thing that they feel loved and accepted for what they really are? Dont they just look more hungre for acceptence from men and mens desire.. When i see a lady showing her boobs like we see on pictuers our in tv, our out in the street I thing: wauw.. Shes really hungry for someone to tell her that shes speciel, because she dosnt know in her heart that shes speciel and uniqe, if she knew that, she wouldt desire to be something that she isnt.
[color]I was so close to order the pill in agust 2010[/color]. And i thought:
Yes, im gonna be happy now. Daniel really loves me but this will make him think that I'm sexy (always). BUT, I keept praying, and paryed. I prayed an honest prayer to god one night, almost sounded like:
Dear God, I cant anymore, I'm about to exploe inside of sadness and hunger for acceptece. to accept my self. I constantly think about how good it would be, if I got bigger breasts. God, please Show me that you have a plan with me, whisper to my heart and in my mind that you want me the best. GOD, I want to know your truth and not the worlds lies, turn my heart towards you, lead my to the best, i give my trust to you.
My story is much longer than this and there are more people involved, who have been helping me and praying for me. One thing I will say: I've been thinking the excat same thoughts as you. Every day I was thinking about my breast size and felt sad that they was not bigger. I've been angry and upset and even yelling out towards God - because I couldnt understand why he just couldnt let my boobs grow to larger breasts. But I have seen something, something I will never forget and that's why I spend so much time to write to YOU! AND IM NOT GOOD at english, as you see. BUY if you've read all this and got to the end, you must have a longing that is about something deeper and more meaningful than big breasts. Have you thought about, what that is? have you asked God if he can help you? It takes time and it is only 3 months ago that I really experienced Freedom in my mind and about my breast size.
........ [color]Ofcource im not perfect now, and somethimes i still think [/color]about what it would be like, but then i look at all the good things, and my heart is just so much more complete then it has even been before. Believe me, to day when i see girls with bigger boobs, i can controll my self, and my thoughts. Im not judgen my self and telling my self that im not good enough. Its like i see thise girls and the dram of bigger boobs in a nother light. I dont know how to explain, but i can say that its like someone have giving me some nye "glasses" and i see the world and my self in a hole different way. I see the "lie" that before was my "truth" and i feel more free then ever. MY DREAM is to love my self, my drem is to let my husbend love me the way i am, the way my body looks. I want to feel proud about my precious body, because I'm unique. I wish for you that you must experience this. YOU are welcome to write me private. I'll answer you back. I'll will not delete my profile yet. Hope to hear from you and if you have some questions for me, please write even if you thik im totally crazy.
This is someting i want you to have. And i got it for free but i had to give it time. No matter if your a believer our not, just let me know if you want to talk.
Peace be with you all the way into yours hearts's depths.
Lovingly, cat !
.
ps.
I accepted that there will always be a girl thats more beautiful on the outside, have bigger breast.. thats still hard to accept i must admit. But I feel free because i dont feel like I have to be something that im not. To be beauti on the inside, is a non-talked topic in our days. BUT we need it deeply, because the truth lies inside ours hearts. Theres something about people how accept them self for what they are. Its almost like that automatically become the worlds most adoreable persons and their eyes just shine in a way we cant descripe. Have you ever meet a person like that..
.back then I knew that if I married, i would have to work with myself in relation to self-esteem. I married as I said, and it's the best I could do. After some mounts beeing married I've started to think that it might be nice to have bigger breasts. My "truth" was that if I had it, I would be more happy, feel more attractive, be more cofident when im naked but...... Here comes my story and what workd for me!!!!
[color]This summer of 2010 blew my mind away. [/color]I started to only wear push up bras. thats ok, but i did it because i wanted to feel.., you know what im talking about...
I was so unsecure of myself when I saw other girls with big boobs and I was especially unsecure if i watched movies with my husbend, and ladies with big boobs were on the tv. My heart starede to pump more and more.
My man has really been patient with thise feelings i have about my look. The thought occupied me every day and I feelt that i had to find out how I could get bigger breasts. MY thoughts was like this:
If i just find a pill that could help me, i would be so happy and such a loverabel wife "knowing" that i im beautiful, attractive to my husband and not borring to wacht. (My husband has never complained about my breasts size even they are not big. He was crazy about me because my personality has that something, he is looking for and that he is totally crazy about. ( have you ever meet a lovely, good, respected man that married his lady because of her boobs? no way, not if hes a real man! Back to the case
MY man has tried always to tell me i was beautiful and he really treated me well. But what can that help, if i believe that im not good enough, only if i get thise bigger boobs. Do you know the feeling? Despite the thought My mand had about me, I felt that i could make him even happier, more sateficed with me, if my boobs were bigger, i would be more interesting and (Try to notice how much fokus I have on My self, its all me me me) That I could satisfy him even more if the boobs just filled a little more. I began to cry for myself in the evenings and asked my dear father in heaven: Dear God, will you please let them grow just a little, you see how sad i am, I'd really like if you listen to me, if just they were a bit bigger i would be so more happy, and dont you want me to be happy?. There was no answer back right there!?, but I continued to spend time with God, to pray God, that he would help me and my prayers always sounded like "i would be so glad if.. bla bla" Nothing really happend, but i trusted God and hoped that he would help, deep in my heart i knew he wanted the best for me. One day i looked at different websites and i dont now how, but i saw this site. From that day i was totally consumed. I started to be online in approxmely 5 houers every day for 14 days.
My husbend asked me [color]"what are you doing on the website for so long? I told him my secret and he was SO confused. I thought it would be a little embarrassing to say that I would like my breasts to be bigger. I thought it was embarrassing because:[/color]1) My dear man wouldnt understand why this suddenly had such an influence on my, and why? I knew he would ask me face to face: What it your motive? Do you really think your gonna have a happier/better man? a more satesfied man? No way he said. Thats your lie, that become your truth. Why would you change your breast, when you want other girls to believe in them selvs for what they really are? I was embarrised, because what he said was true.
2) It tells something about my personallity, that Im willing to change myself, not to accept my self. Deep down my heart burns for people, and one of my dreams is to help girls, to love them self. But how could i tell another girl: Your just wounderfull as you are, if i dont start with my self first? AND THATS hard, BUT TRULY true.
3) My hearts deepst desire is to be loved, and accepted for WHAT I already am. To feel like Im special. To feel like a have something great to offer this world, to offer my love. Scould i let the breast size deside what i thinking about my self? It would be imbarresing to admit that im so caut up in this worlds idee of what is sexy and attractive. To change my breast size I would be in a conflict towards my deepst desire, as i have mentioned.
4) I also thought it would be embarrassing because,indirectly i would say to my man: I know you love me, but thats not enough for me. I want more. I want more, I, I, I. . ."And the sex we have is good but I want you to desire me more ( my body) and I found a way of doing that.(i think) The boobs will make me more secure as a women, because i know you would think that im sexy. because that is what become my truth, that is what the world and me media want me to belive, and i see it every day and i accepted it and want it. So NOW, stop and think:
is it all about giving a guy an orgasm and not that he wants you because of YOU, and not just your boobs. Deep inside us all, we hunger for real love, ( if we'r not to blind to know what real love is?) real Love and good sex is healing and funny, intimetive. Sometime when me and my man have sex, he reminds me: Kat, this is about you and me, us.. and not how you look, our how your boobs looks. He can honsterly feel when im thinking: oh how do i look in this possion, and do i satefices him enough. Thats not a good sign.
i wish what i have experienced thise last 5mounths would be something you experience in your one life too.
But this is something you must spend time to understand and let your heart grow into. When the thoughts of big breast feel so much as i do right now to you, then i know its difficult to believe that accepting you one breast is the biggest gift you can give yourself.
Its so hard to say NO at something that seems to behold the best for you - If you look at All the pictuers of girls showing there big breasts? Do you really think that they are happy? Do you really thing that they feel loved and accepted for what they really are? Dont they just look more hungre for acceptence from men and mens desire.. When i see a lady showing her boobs like we see on pictuers our in tv, our out in the street I thing: wauw.. Shes really hungry for someone to tell her that shes speciel, because she dosnt know in her heart that shes speciel and uniqe, if she knew that, she wouldt desire to be something that she isnt.
[color]I was so close to order the pill in agust 2010[/color]. And i thought:
Yes, im gonna be happy now. Daniel really loves me but this will make him think that I'm sexy (always). BUT, I keept praying, and paryed. I prayed an honest prayer to god one night, almost sounded like:
Dear God, I cant anymore, I'm about to exploe inside of sadness and hunger for acceptece. to accept my self. I constantly think about how good it would be, if I got bigger breasts. God, please Show me that you have a plan with me, whisper to my heart and in my mind that you want me the best. GOD, I want to know your truth and not the worlds lies, turn my heart towards you, lead my to the best, i give my trust to you.
My story is much longer than this and there are more people involved, who have been helping me and praying for me. One thing I will say: I've been thinking the excat same thoughts as you. Every day I was thinking about my breast size and felt sad that they was not bigger. I've been angry and upset and even yelling out towards God - because I couldnt understand why he just couldnt let my boobs grow to larger breasts. But I have seen something, something I will never forget and that's why I spend so much time to write to YOU! AND IM NOT GOOD at english, as you see. BUY if you've read all this and got to the end, you must have a longing that is about something deeper and more meaningful than big breasts. Have you thought about, what that is? have you asked God if he can help you? It takes time and it is only 3 months ago that I really experienced Freedom in my mind and about my breast size.
........ [color]Ofcource im not perfect now, and somethimes i still think [/color]about what it would be like, but then i look at all the good things, and my heart is just so much more complete then it has even been before. Believe me, to day when i see girls with bigger boobs, i can controll my self, and my thoughts. Im not judgen my self and telling my self that im not good enough. Its like i see thise girls and the dram of bigger boobs in a nother light. I dont know how to explain, but i can say that its like someone have giving me some nye "glasses" and i see the world and my self in a hole different way. I see the "lie" that before was my "truth" and i feel more free then ever. MY DREAM is to love my self, my drem is to let my husbend love me the way i am, the way my body looks. I want to feel proud about my precious body, because I'm unique. I wish for you that you must experience this. YOU are welcome to write me private. I'll answer you back. I'll will not delete my profile yet. Hope to hear from you and if you have some questions for me, please write even if you thik im totally crazy.
This is someting i want you to have. And i got it for free but i had to give it time. No matter if your a believer our not, just let me know if you want to talk.
Peace be with you all the way into yours hearts's depths.
Lovingly, cat !
.
ps.
I accepted that there will always be a girl thats more beautiful on the outside, have bigger breast.. thats still hard to accept i must admit. But I feel free because i dont feel like I have to be something that im not. To be beauti on the inside, is a non-talked topic in our days. BUT we need it deeply, because the truth lies inside ours hearts. Theres something about people how accept them self for what they are. Its almost like that automatically become the worlds most adoreable persons and their eyes just shine in a way we cant descripe. Have you ever meet a person like that..