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We're glad to hear that you are doing this for YOU and not just him! As far as attraction goes, is it correct to assume then that the only issue/holdup he is having is with the size of your breasts? That's not so bad...
If you tell him you're working on it, 1) he'll have hope there where he originally was feeling torn, letting him put the issue behind him. When I began working out again, and even now (as my butt is still not big enough for him, lmao big greedy baby!) he was not worried or thinking about it because he knew I was "on my way" to "destination butt" lol. ALSO 2) he'll be so flattered at your willingness to care about his attraction to you. Most men are afraid of getting into relationships with or marrying women because of our stereotypical habit of letting ourselves go once we "have" our men. And physical attraction is very important for men, and I respect that to the degree I see that you respect it. Therefore, men get afraid of us not caring about our appearances, haha. Having a few "must haves" or "must not haves" is healthy and normal for anyone to have when it comes to attraction. I know that I am guilty of this myself.
Just tell him confidently you are working on it, and make it known that it is something YOU want for yourself as well as the added bonus of it pleasing him, but it is something that YOU want (this is important so that he does not think you would do ANYTHING to be with him) and I personally think that that should be enough to solve the problem if he likes everything else about you and really cares for you.
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Thank you so much
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(12-06-2013, 03:03)timarie Wrote: If you tell him you're working on it, 1) he'll have hope there where he originally was feeling torn, letting him put the issue behind him. When I began working out again, and even now (as my butt is still not big enough for him, lmao big greedy baby!) he was not worried or thinking about it because he knew I was "on my way" to "destination butt" lol. ALSO 2) he'll be so flattered at your willingness to care about his attraction to you. Most men are afraid of getting into relationships with or marrying women because of our stereotypical habit of letting ourselves go once we "have" our men. And physical attraction is very important for men, and I respect that to the degree I see that you respect it. Therefore, men get afraid of us not caring about our appearances, haha. Having a few "must haves" or "must not haves" is healthy and normal for anyone to have when it comes to attraction. I know that I am guilty of this myself.
Ugh. I have noticed that tendency among some girls... and I just can't understand it. I was so stupidly unhealthy previously only because I was just too damned depressed to care about much of anything, let alone my body.
I actually don't care too much about my guy's appearance as long as he takes some measure of care of himself. He can even be a bit heavy as long as he's not morbidly obese and appears to be putting in at least some effort to keep from ending up there.
He can have long hair, as long as he takes care of it, and if I start seeing more of him and find out he keeps a messy house... Yeah. Not happening. I get enough of that at home from my brother and the boarder.
Other than that... it's personality that I'm interested in... and these things tend to go along with the personality that attracts me anyways...
As for me... I've learned that my body can be very difficult to maintain, but maintaining it I will. For the rest of my life. I already did too much damage to it when I wasn't being myself.
And SENIO... I cannot stress enough that you HAVE to do this strictly and entirely for YOU. Otherwise you will lose interest, because it's hard, it's time-consuming, and it's expensive. And ain't no guy worth that. There's plenty of fish in that sea out there and there's bound to be one somewhere who'll be interested in YOU for YOU and won't care about ANY of the little things. Guys on the whole actually tend to be even less discriminating than women. I don't know ANY girl who'll get with just any body... But I've known guys who'd stick theirs in anything it'll fit into. I've had the.... pleasure.... of working with a couple of such.
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I'm so disgusted that a man can be so shallow as to pass up a girl he likes because he can't find beauty in her body. I think all bodies are beautiful, I have seen women with severe tuberous breasts pointing straight down and still thought they were beautiful they had glowing tan skin and a feminine shaped body. Flaws can be beautiful and are not necessarily flaws at all, they make you unique! Wouldn't you rather have a man who loves you for you so you know when you grow old and wrinkly with that person they're not going to leave you because you are no longer attractive anymore? Flaws in my opinion are a blessing in disguise. A man who dates a flawed woman is proof they're in it for love and not looks. If you get perfect breasts for him you will never be completely content you will forever worry about any new flaw that he might be unattracted by. Don't change yourself to make someone pleased with you! There's someone out there that is meant for you and will be ridiculously attracted to you. I found mine and he told me he thought I was the most beautiful girl he ever saw. But I'm not! In his eyes I was though, I know this is true, all his friends told me this, but I am so flawed and have been told my flaws by PLENTY of people. Hairy, crooked teeth, chunky, small odd shaped breasts but all he sees is beauty. God can take flaws and make them beautiful to others. Plus there's plenty of men who prefer smaller breasts. I always found it strange but lots of men like that natalie Portman look.
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If it's his first serious relationship he may just not be mature enough yet. But don't change yourself for a guy, it's not worth it, especially such an expensive, time consuming, and permanent change. *hugs*
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Senio12-
When it comes to men I am pretty cut and dry, and frankly, this has helped me immensely.
When other women are searching desperately between the lines (I did that only once in my life, I have been there...tortuous and a waste of time) I see the bottom line.
You do not need to waste time on a boy who is not sure if he is attracted to you. I don't even need to see you to know plenty of men will find you desirable and beautiful.
There are tons of men, you are young, and you can leave this one behind and not look back.
Wish him the best, and don't look back.
All the best -
jmarie.
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(16-10-2013, 01:09)jmarie73 Wrote: Senio12-
When it comes to men I am pretty cut and dry, and frankly, this has helped me immensely.
When other women are searching desperately between the lines (I did that only once in my life, I have been there...tortuous and a waste of time) I see the bottom line.
You do not need to waste time on a boy who is not sure if he is attracted to you. I don't even need to see you to know plenty of men will find you desirable and beautiful.
There are tons of men, you are young, and you can leave this one behind and not look back.
Wish him the best, and don't look back.
All the best -
jmarie.
Not sure if you noticed, but she REALLY likes this guy because of a long friendship relationship they've had. That is really a unique situation, honestly, and if just a little hiccup like this (about her breasts) exists, she does not need to be so "cut and dry." Being "cut and dry" and eliminating anyone with the slightest issue in a relationship is NOT a luxury of being a woman whom plenty of men will find desirable and beautiful; rather, it IS a luxury of being a woman who is not very selective or picky. Trust me, as there are those of us who have PLENTY of interest shown towards us but, if we don't feel it for them, then that's it. And we don't "feel it" for most of them. Trust, I have only "felt it" for a whopping total of 2 men in the past 5 years. So wow, I guess being a girl who many find desirable and beautiful will really serve me well then, huh? Um, not really. I don't settle for a man with whom I do not feel chemistry. So sometimes, when a woman finds something that really makes her heart sing when hardly anyone else has been able to do this for her, you bet that a small hiccup of his honesty (which is a GOOD thing, btw) is not going to get in the way of things for her.
Plus if you noticed she only made 3 posts and has not been on since June when she joined. I am pretty sure she came on BN just to post this question and leave... but thanks for your input anyway! Lucky for you that you have the flexibility to be cut and dry! Those of us less fortunate would miss out on our only opportunities to love if we were to take up the art of being cut and dry
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I wonder if she really pursued NBE and had any progress with it...
Im just glad my long time boyfriend accepts may 32As just as they are. He doesn't have an inkllng what Im doing with them now.
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(11-06-2013, 09:18)SENIO12 Wrote: Alrighty people, I really need your help!! I'm dating this guy, we started off as best friends and started actually dating 3 months ago. We got talking and he openly stated to me that he wasn't too attracted to me physically which is why we didn't date earlier. He only sees me as a best friend and can't do anything more with me because of how I look. He specifically mentioned my breast size, like the girls he had dated earlier were more developed. This caused a big fight between us and we just don't know how to resolved it...
I know that I'm undersized... I'm 19 years old and can barely fit an A cup. I'm about 5' 7" and weigh about 105 pounds. It doesn't help that I'm a dairy vegetarian (meaning that I eat dairy but nothing else coming from animals). We're currently taking a break because of this argument caused. I'm going home from college over Summer Break and we'll be about 430 miles apart until I see him again in August. I have this summer to get my body in shape for him. I really need some advice on how to utilize this summer and come back a more curvy woman for him.
It's his first serious relationship and he's just confused about things and what love is about and why he can't get closer to me. My small breasts don't leave him satisfied and I can't do anything about it. We're not sexually active but enjoy our touchy feely phase, or so I thought... Please please please, help me!! Give me some advice on what to do. Anything that'll really help me. How to do these massages, what to eat, how to increase my breast size without going through any surgery. I don't want him to think I'm pathetic or anything. If it's all natural he'll approve and we won't have that physical issue between us. Any help will be greatly appreciated. I love him so much and I know he does too, we're just really awkward right now..
Go grow those boobs and show him who's boss hahaha I cant believe I am supporting women above men ahaha Im heterosexual and I hate to see men complaining about boobs like that. I would take any size so.
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(16-10-2013, 10:25)Koko Wrote: I wonder if she really pursued NBE and had any progress with it...
Im just glad my long time boyfriend accepts may 32As just as they are. He doesn't have an inkllng what Im doing with them now.
my hubby is gorgeous and accepts me for my little a cups too! he also has no idea what im doing, he tells me he loves my body but im hoping to surprise him one day with bigger boobies ha ha.
do you find it hard to hide if from your man koko cause I do lol
the worst bit was my daughter catching me noogling one day then ran around telling my hubby and anyone who would listen
"my mummy has a boobie pump!!!" - omg I nearly died!!! needless to say she didn't get taken out much over the next few days lol
