[Karren H]

Yeah.... The CIA would be proud of me.... keeping a secret for 5 decades them opppsss..... boom!

[jamixoxo]

So... I might just be getting a boyfriend soon...
...
Gaaaaaah! I sooo was not seeing this coming at this point in time. I suppose I should have and should have done something to prepare myself for the possibility of dating but... My focus has just been on anything but!

I guess advice is welcome but I mainly just needed to let this all out somewhere.

If any of it even makes coherent sense... lol.

Now that the dust has settled a bit... No real advice, just some observations/thoughts.

Yes, it makes sense... You, dear, are a budding rose - holding all the promise that entails. It's time to "see that coming"! Others obviously are
I think the most promising thing about this event is that you were excited at the possibility... Nervous, scared, and all that go with of course.
It's almost better it fell out the way it did - consider it a dry run for your emotions. Now you're better prepared for the next time - 'cause it's gonna happen!

Madame Jamiletta, my non-existent great, great gypsy grandmother, who I'm channeling right now, predicts a happy love life... She can see it in your 'squircle' So you still "might be getting a boyfriend soon".

-j

[Alexapp]

Congratulations on being asked out. That is a real accomplishment in itself. However, there are a few things you may want to think about before going out with him.

I personally don't know your sexual tastes and frankly it isn't any of my business but before, you encourage him any farther, I would stop and ask myself two questions. Am I ok with dating a man? and Am I willing to sleep with a Man and in general, how intimate are you willing to be (cuddling, kissing, etc...) with a man, assuming your relationship goes that far?

If you answer yes to the first question, I would tell him up front that you are a pre-op MTF and make sure he knows what that means.

If you answer the second question as NO or "I don't know," I would also tell him that upfront and very bluntly that you will not have sex with him ever but you still want to date. You would be surprised with the number of guys who are all right with that kind of relationship.

One last peace of advice to keep in mind, is to make sure he is interested in Who you are and not What you are. He may have know that you are a MTF transsexual before he even sent you a friend request, depending on what your mutual friend told him and how tight your privacy settings are.

Make sure he wants to date you for who you are and not just because you are a transsexual. Some men will do anything and/or say anything to get in bed with a transsexual. The reason why I bring this up is that a MTF friend of mine was dating a guy and she really cared for him. However, after they had sex the first time she never heard from him again. My friend didn't take this well at all, needless to say.

[AbiDrew85]

Congratulations on being asked out. That is a real accomplishment in itself. However, there are a few things you may want to think about before going out with him.

I personally don't know your sexual tastes and frankly it isn't any of my business but before, you encourage him any farther, I would stop and ask myself two questions. Am I ok with dating a man? and Am I willing to sleep with a Man and in general, how intimate are you willing to be (cuddling, kissing, etc...) with a man, assuming your relationship goes that far?

If you answer yes to the first question, I would tell him up front that you are a pre-op MTF and make sure he knows what that means.

If you answer the second question as NO or "I don't know," I would also tell him that upfront and very bluntly that you will not have sex with him ever but you still want to date. You would be surprised with the number of guys who are all right with that kind of relationship.

One last peace of advice to keep in mind, is to make sure he is interested in Who you are and not What you are. He may have know that you are a MTF transsexual before he even sent you a friend request, depending on what your mutual friend told him and how tight your privacy settings are.

Make sure he wants to date you for who you are and not just because you are a transsexual. Some men will do anything and/or say anything to get in bed with a transsexual. The reason why I bring this up is that a MTF friend of mine was dating a guy and she really cared for him. However, after they had sex the first time she never heard from him again. My friend didn't take this well at all, needless to say.

Yeah... Never actually quite happened that way at all. I shot it down before it had a chance to get that far by being honest.

As for my sexuality... It's kinda complicated but the short answer is I will be marrying a man someday if anyone. VERY slight possibility I MIGHT end up in a "lesbian" relationship, but most likely to be with a man. I put lesbian in quotes because my female lover would have to be extremely man-like in personality though not necessarily looks to attract me. I'm attracted to a certain personality type... And it's a type most commonly held by men. But not unheard of for women. There've been a few here that fit my type and are female...

As for my settings and my mutual friend. I can trust her with ANYTHING. And my privacy's pretty tight.

And he was quite obviously not a chaser. Not even close. After my revelation broke he went silent for a while and then basically said nope, can't do it. As in he can't see himself getting romantic with someone who used to be "male".

[Alexapp]

I am sorry it didn't work out for you but at least you found out, before you got emotionally invested.

[AbiDrew85]

I am sorry it didn't work out for you but at least you found out, before you got emotionally invested.

LOL... I kinda didn't totally not. We girls can be funny like that sometimes!

It could have been much worse though, yes. And not only in that one way.

EDIT: Now you can please stop reminding me this particular example didn't work out...